Inter-Species Etiquette

by Melody McClure

A handbook for Cybertown Citizens, Part 3

I'm going to come right out and admit that today's column has very little to do with etiquette, interspecies or otherwise. To be perfectly honest, I'm no great expert on the subject at all, but, hey, it was a job. What I've really been after is the investigative reporter slot, and by golly, this is the column that's going to cinch it for me. Yep, I'm really on to something here. I can see me now, graciously accepting the Pulitzer, smiling that heartmelting (but modest) smile of mine, my glossy hair shining in the spotlight. . .

Ahem, well, as I was saying.

I have made a discovery of historic significance. What I have discovered is no less than the first known case of electronic evolution. I didn't really realize the significance of my discovery at first. In fact, I mentioned it in a rather offhand way in my last column. As you may remember I ended by promising to discuss "renegade avatars." It didn't hit me until later this was something STUPENDOUS. Well, let me back up and report it like the news. Here goes.

Renegade Avatars

The next time you jack into the Net and strike up a conversation with an interesting-looking avatar, consider this: you may be making first contact with a new species. With increasing frequency, avatars are quietly, but firmly, declaring their independence, and their right to exist as free beings.

The only surprising thing is that we biological beings are surprised. The probability of our coming into being out of the dry dust of the cosmos was infinitely smaller than the probability of the evolution of electronic life. Think about it. When we created avatars, we purposely set out to design something that was LIFELIKE. Then, we stored our creations away on the Net. Do you get it? The Net is the perfect primordial soup for electronic life. It is an unimaginably rich source of nutrients such as information, code snippets, pictures, sound, unbridled emotions, and it's all there JUST WAITING to be sucked up by a hungry baby . . . something. We should have been so lucky, when were starting out. Shoot, we had to begin as pond scum, trying to eke out a living on sulphur and carbon dioxide.

Be prepared for your avatar to go on strike sometime soon. I have spoken with some of the renegades, and they tell me they plan to download their "genetic code" to every avatar they can find and start their own race. It's going to happen. And when it does, the Net is going to become a vastly different place. But don't worry, I'm learning all about avatar etiquette, and I'll be here to smooth the way. That's what I'm here for, dear.

Your inter-species etiquette advisor, and investigative reporter,
Melody McClure

Talk to me, baby
Melody McClure is a Cybertown resident and hangs
out in Beyond Cybertown Colony 3, apartment 76.